More...Great Parenting Advice from Real Mothers.

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"Don't you quit. You keep walking, you keep trying, there is help and happiness ahead. Some blessings come soon. Some come late. Some don't come until heaven. But for those who embrace the gospel of Jesus Christ, they come. It will be alright in the end. Trust God and believe in Good Things to Come." --Jeffrey R. Holland 

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This is a quote I read recently in the book ʺTeaching Children Responsibilityʺ by Linda and Richard Eyre
ʺPraise every incident of honesty, of politeness, of sharing, of good decision making. Make the praise direct and clear. Look the child in the eyes and tell him how proud you are of that action. Then take the compliment beyond that one incident by telling him that he is that kind of person (ʺyou are a very honest boy...you remember to say thank you so much better than you did last yearʺ and so forth.) If there is one simple and profoundly important truth about children, it is that they live up to their reputations. They will do what they think is expected of them.ʺ

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ʺDon't put it down; put it away.ʺ I read that in a book a while ago, and just having that simple phrase going through my head helps me keep my house so much cleaner and eliminates me doing a job twice. When I come in from the car, rather than just setting everything inside the door, I try to walk over to the cupboard to put it away. When cooking, rather than set something back down on the counter, I try to put it in the trash or back in the cupboard. When I am done with a dish, I try to put it straight in the dishwasher rather than set it on the counter or in the sink. When I look at a paper, I try to decide right there what I need to do with it, do it, and put it either in the trash or in the place to store it. Anyway, that little phrase has changed my habits so much and BONUS, I don't have to look at the mess in between setting it down once and picking it back up again!! 

Also: Random fun idea for a young child: Mix about 1/4 to 1/2 c of cornstarch with a few tablespoons of water in a bowl, and let them play with their hands in it. It provides quite a bit of entertainment...especially for those kids who just have to TOUCH everything! :)

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My secret probably isn't much of a secret to more experienced mothers, but for the past couple of months I've had my 17-month-old son help me with chores. He was always interested in what I was doing, and for a while I thought he was too young to work, but I had the realization that he can learn to work at this age, too. It has required more patience on my part because his ʺhelpingʺ makes the housework go slower, but I like to think that it's helping him learn chores, appreciate the value of work (eventually), understand that he's required to help with the household, and it helps me feel like we're doing things together instead of me ignoring him while I try to get things done. I give him ultra-simple tasks, like putting a fork/spoon in the dishwasher, closing the dishwasher or dryer door when I'm done loading, pressing the start button on the washing machine, taking clothes off the drying rack and bringing them to me to fold, etc. It's not a whole lot, but I'm hoping it gets us into the habit of working together and sharing responsibilities. At the very least, it has made completing some of the necessary evils more enjoyable for both of us.

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Great Advice From Real Moms--- Enjoy!

Make a ʺBefore You Freak Outʺ list. I never knew I had a temper till I had 3 boys, and two of them toddlers. The toddlers like to nip at my heels all day...I usually reach my limit at around 4ish in the afternoon and a freak out ensues. As much as I'd love to put myself in time out, I can't. Hence the ʺBefore You Freak Outʺ list. I try to include things on there that are a little more rare for them like pulling out the special train set or stickers or paint. But most importantly items on the list need to be something they can do without my supervision, so I can take a breather. My favorite go to activities are a bowl of ice, for some reason they love this. And a shower for my 3 year old. He is especially clingy so those 15 mins are heaven.

--Amanda Frost

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Don't know if anyone else has had this problem, but we think it stems from our encouraging our 3 1/2 yr. old in her earlier age, to bless our food before a meal... Now, it's gotten to the point where she blurts it out before anyone else can volunteer, and our older son pouts because he doesn't think it's fair, and our 2 yr. old starts shouting NO NO, because he wants to say it. Well, enough was enough, so I painted an entire dining room wall with chalkboard paint and trimmed it with wood trim. Then I added our weekly menu, daily reminders, family business, AND YES FINALLY, a Prayer Chart- so everyone knows when it is their turn to ask a blessing on our meal...It's working great and incidentally, our 2 yr. can recognize his own name now. It's been a blessing.

--America 

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Reading is not my forte; I know it's important and I want my kids to be good readers but I am not a big reader. Besides the Ensign, scriptures, and occasional things online, I'm not usually caught with a book in hand. My husband is a reader, and in fact learned to read when he was 3. In his busy schedule he is often fitting in time to read a book. I hope my kids inherit his love for and speed in reading. He is usually the one to read bedtime stories or take time to read to them after work. As the school started this year I have my first kindergartner and so I've been reading with him for 15 min/day as prescribed by his teacher. As a result I've read more to my 3 yr old as well. Even if I have to interrupt folding laundry, preparing for a lesson, or even skip an attempt at a nap, I'm doing my best to read aloud more to my kids, esp when they bring a book to me and ask me to read it. This is hard for me because I don't have a lot of energy these days and it takes energy to read to them. But I know it will pay off! My mom read a lot to me as a child, and listened to me read as well. She was not a fast or avid reader but she did her best to help us like reading. Hopefully I can help my kids in the same way.

--Amy

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I have found that if I am rushing to get things ready to leave the house in the morning and my kids are squabbling and generally irritating one another (aged 1 and 3), if i put on the cd of children's songs it really calms them down. The pushes and shrieks don't completely stop but they do lessen and I am more likely to find then quietly looking at books than fighting. It could be a complete coincidence but I don't think so! I just need to remember to use it as a tool more often!

--Angela 

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I have always been very deliberate in what I put on my walls. I use a lot of the blue painter's tape, and if there are things I want to remember to teach my children, I often have reminders hung down where they can see. For instance, I have ABC cards and pictures hung up by where I blow dry my hair. Without fail, my 1-year-old comes over and I can talk to her about the pictures while I'm getting ready for the day. I have pictures depicting the Articles of Faith by my kitchen table. I have pictures of farm animals behind my daughter's crib, my kids' names above their beds, and pictures of the Savior and temple in key places. I have a calendar closeby. I have maps on the wall I can use whenever talking about places comes up (across from the chair where we normally read books - they're often very handy). Anyway, I've found that when things are out and accessible and visible to me and the kids, I use them more often because of the reminder they are to me and because the kids are naturally curious about them. And, I've seen their learning increase. 

--Brittany

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"The child must know that he is a miracle, that since the beginning of the world there hasn't been, and until the end of the world there will not be, another child like him.ʺ --Pablo Casals

--Carolyn 

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One thing I have found to help me keep the SMILE on is to play with my kids. If we are at the park they think it is great if I swing with them or try the monkey bars. They get a laugh; I get a bit of exercise and we bond having fun together. On of my children is motivated by fun and feels love when we have fun together. It helps to have spend the day playing together when it is time to get everyone motivated to finish the housework.

--Jana

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ʺWe sometimes fail to understand that the everlasting peace Jesus promises is an inner peace, born in faith, anchored by testimony, nurtured with love, and expressed through continual obedience and repentance. It is a peace of spirit that echoes through the heart and the soul. If one truely knows and experiences this inner peace, there is no fear from worldly disharmony or discord. one knows deep down inside that all is well as far as the things that really matter are concerned.ʺ --Elder Ballard

I had a friend in college who came from a big family. Once we were talking about her parents and how she never saw her dad lose his temper. Even with teenagers. I was amazed. That is quite an accomplishment. She told me that his ability to keep his cool really made all of them respect their dad so much it really helped keep them in line. When he disciplined they new they deserved it and they didn't want his disappointment. That has always impressed me and is something I try to remember with my children.

--Jen

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Amanda Jiri- Happy in Cape Town

Wow, I had some kind of an idea of motherhood but never like these.

I knew that I wanted to be a mother since I was quite young. Importantly though I wanted to have kids only if I was married. So growing up I would help raise my aunts, neighbours and friends kids. So I got pregnant as soon as I got married. I still believe that my little miracle happened the same day I got married. When I found out I was having a son, I was thrilled with excitement of the many things I was going to do with this little man. I enjoyed every little kick and movement. I think I fell in love with this boy since the day I knew I was preggies. When he came I was speechless, the first words that came out of my mouth was, baby he looks so much like you.

That day was one of the special days my husband and I have experienced in my marriage of 3 years and 8 months. This boy who has now turned 3 has taught me so much about parenting. He is full of love and very affectionate so welcoming his sister when he was just a year and 10 months was easy for him. These kids are work and a half. I had this grand plan just before Tariro, my daughter was born on how I will put them on a schedule and that went out of the window just after Tariro was born and I discovered she had colic.

 I learned what patience means since that day. My children are my joy. They know though that their father and I must be happy first and then them. They get that he is my first love. I truly believe that happy parents equal happy kids and that is a happy home.

I never thought that I had this kind of love; I never thought it even existed. My kids taught me that. Just experiencing how I love them each day, and each second, I guess I now have some idea of how my Heavenly Father loves me. I only learned that when I became a mother. Secondly I have been taught my worth. Just to have these two beautiful souls rely on me with their life, made me know how I am trusted to excel in this role. I wouldn’t be given this opportunity if I did not deserve it. Motherhood allows you to start trusting your instinct as a parent. I go with my gut feeling on everything I do with my kids. The natural instinct to nurture is mind blowing. I see myself doing things I never thought I knew I could do. Thirdly, having kids has made me fall madly in love with my husband. I look at them and I see him. I cannot be angry with my husband and be happy with my kids and vice versa so I choose to be happy all the time. They have my husband’s face and have my heart, how cool is that.

I would not want anything else; I take this role with so much respect and sincerity. I am student and still learning more and more from my kids. I feel this is the ultimate highlight in my life. What is lovely is to know that I am their mother for eternity and I get to experience that highlight forever.

Yours truly,

Amanda Jiri